There is a new type of chemtrail in the sky over Russia. Orthodox priests have thrown liters of holy water over the city of Tver in an attempt to save its citizens from substance abuse and fornication.

The clergymen boarded a small plane before attempting to cure people in the central Russian city of Tver who were suffering from alcoholism and drug dependency. The priests brought 70 liters of holy water for their procession, along with two icons: the “Inexhaustible Chalice,” which is said to heal those suffering from alcoholism and drug addiction, and an icon of John the Baptist. A married couple that claims the husband was miraculously cured of alcoholism was also on board the flight.

Once the plane reached 200 – 300 meters the clergyman started dumping the holy water over the town.

Some people, for reasons I cannot fathom, thought that this undertaking is ridiculous, but Father Alexander Goryachev had an answer ready for them.

“What is the joke? That we’re trying to help people get rid of diseases? We promote stopping alcohol consumption, drugs and fornication — is this laughable?” Goryachev told Tvernews.com when asked whether people would take the act seriously. “Let them laugh and we will do our job,” he said.

I applaud the priests unbelievable stupidity coupled with surprisingly efficient and practical thinking, but I have an even better suggestion for them. Why not just dump the stuff into the citiy’s water suppyl and save themselves the hassle of renting a plane?

A school in Nashville, Tennessee has banned JK Rowling’s Harry Potter books after the pastor who runs the school declared the books contain real spells and curses. 

Reverend Dan Reehill, of St Edward Catholic School in Nashville, told parents in an email that he had spoken to exorcists in the US and at the Vatican before banning the book series.

“These books present magic as both good and evil, which is not true, but in fact a clever deception. The curses and spells used in the books are actual curses and spells; which when read by a human being risk conjuring evil spirits into the presence of the person reading the text,” Reverend Reehill wrote.

Rebecca Hammel, the superintendent of schools for the Catholic Diocese of Nashville, said since the Catholic Church does not have an official position on the Harry Potter Mr Reehill has the final say on the subject.

“Each pastor has canonical authority to make such decisions for his parish school,” she said. “He’s well within his authority to act in that manner.”

More than 20,000 people led by a Christian organization have targeted Netflix, demanding that they cancel Good Omens, the series based on the best-selling novel by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett.

The series, which centers on representatives from Heaven and Hell who secretly get together to try and delay the apocalypse so they can keep living responsibility-free lives on Earth was not received well by many Christian organizations.

The Return to Order campaign, which organized the petition, says that Good Omens is “another step to make satanism appear normal, light and acceptable”, and “mocks God’s wisdom”. God, they complain, is “voiced by a woman” – Frances McDormand – the antichrist is a “normal kid” and, most importantly, “this type of video makes light of Truth, Error, Good and Evil, and destroys the barriers of horror that society still has for the devil”. They are calling on Netflix to cancel the show. The problem is that the show can be only watched on Amazon Prime Video.

The co-writer of the book and TV series Neil Gaiman responded to the petition on Twitter, writing: “I love that they are going to write to Netflix to try and get #GoodOmens canceled. Says it all really. This is so beautiful … Promise me you won’t tell them?”