Martin Big, a 31-year-old “model and actress” desperately looking for attention has yet again appeared on a British morning show where she spoke about her plans to hold the world record for having 20-liter implants in each breast.

Martina became famous some months ago when she claimed she can have black babies with her husband, despite them both being white Germans who changed their skin color with injections.

At the moment, Martina is 10 centimeters away from having the biggest boobs in the world, but that will soon change.

“The actual record holder has nine liters in each breast,” she explained. “But my implants, the biggest breast implants in the world are custom made and they weigh 20 liters each side.”

The hosts tried to talk her out of such an endeavor by having her hold two-gallon water bottles and asking her if she wants to carry that weight every day, but she would not be dissuaded. Martina insisted that she will be able to manage that weight with training.

Her existing implants will be gradually enlarged by filling more saline solution into an opening near her armpit. “Step by step, I’m going to try. In the future, it will work for every day.” That’s the attitude, Martina. You go, girl!




Uri Geller, 72, the famous spoon bender and friend of Michael Jackson has written an open letter to the British prime minister Theresa May in which he threatens to stop Brexit telepathically.

“As much as I admire you, I will stop you telepathically from doing this – and believe me I am capable of executing it. Before I take this drastic course of action, I appeal to you to stop the process immediately while you still have a chance.”

Among other crazy things he also claims in the letter that he predicted Theresa May`s election victory “…when I showed you Winston Churchill’s spoon on my Cadillac, which I asked you to touch.” The two have known each other for 21 years.

He also claims that his powers have been validated by the CIA, MI5 and Mossad adding a quote that supposedly comes from the CIA website: “As a result of Geller’s success in this experimental period, we consider that he has demonstrated his paranormal perceptual ability in a convincing and unambiguous manner.”

I would be really scared if I was Theresa May. I mean, the guy can bend spoons with his mind which is totally not just a cheap magic trick.

A medieval tournament? A massacre?

David Huggins from New York claims to have fathered dozens of half-human, half-alien hybrid kids since he lost his virginity at 17 to an alien called Crescent. Why does the alien have an English name? Do they speak English in outer space?

Asked how many children he had fathered, he said: “I was taken into a room and it was filled with babies and I had to touch every one. “The human touch was really important. The first time I touched one of the babies static electricity jumped from my hand to the baby. “This was right before I touched it and I pulled back and said to the Insect-being ‘Wow, did you see that?'” We do not know what the Insect-being replied, but it was probably in English.

David Huggins has painted a series of X-rated images showing him fornicating with an extraterrestrial named Crescent – experiences which led to dozens of hybrid children being born as a result, he claims. The now 74-year-old, from New York, has spoken about his experiences in a documentary, named Love and Saucers. Here is some of his crappy alien sex fetish art:

Take a look at this ten-minute trailer for Cohen’s new show. It shows Republican lawmakers talk about how toddlers should be armed with fun firearms and it will make you laugh, but it will scare even more.