It is 1520 and again you ask yourself the timeless question that has haunted humanity since they decided to shed their fur, skin other living beings and wear their fur instead – What will I wear tonight? Matthäus Schwarz from Augsburg, Germany has decided to document his daily plight and has given us a glimpse into the horrible and silly world of 16th-century street style. Let’s take a look at what he decided to wear that night.

A bold black, white, green, yellow, blue and purple combination with some weird stuff on his balls, presumably there to accentuate his perfectly oval testicles A very bold combination indeed. He wore this to a friends wedding reception in February 1521 when he was 24. If you’ve got it, flaunt it!

This image shows him and his pals doing weird things in their weird testicle-accentuating pants. No, just joking. All three of these figures are actually Matthäus himself doing weird things with himself in his weird testicle-accentuating pants. A few pages include multiple portraits of Schwarz to compare certain styles, such as this image from June of 1524, where he’s shown wearing three different shirts and three types of Prussian leather hose. According to the text, an eight-minute hour-glass (?!) was attached to his thigh in the middle outfit. Those modern Instagram fashion bloggers could learn a lot from him.

Here we see what I believe is him dressed all in black mourning the death of his hamster. The caption actually says: “On 2nd June 1527, in this manner: the doublet from silk satin, a riding gown from camlet, the bonnet edged with velvet, all of this to please a beautiful person, along with a Spanish gown.” There is a fine line between love and a dead hamster.

If you wish to see more of his looks and maybe find some new outfit ideas for the next friend’s wedding or hamster funeral, read this BBC article or go visit the museum  in Braunschweig, Germany where the prints are kept.

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